There is no such thing as a spring college football game. It is not a game. Period. It is an exhibition intra-squad scrimmage. I will die on this hill. I’ll never accept the idea that there is such a thing as a college football “spring game.” Not a “GAME,” but practice. We’re talking about practice (Ok now that I got my A.I. not artificial intelligence, but Allen Iverson, moment out of the way).
It’s just like no professional team has a staff “reporter.” You can’t report on your own boss.
When you work for a TV network that is in direct business partnership with the team, you’re not a reporter. You’re a host or hostess.
So now that we know what spring college football is and, more importantly, what it is not, we can discuss how to rebrand it.
Again, we’re not here to abolish spring college football ga….scrimmages, we’re just here to paint an accurate picture of them.
Football is unnatural in April; it just is
If you are an actual football player or coach, or you work for the school itself, then yes, spring college football is important to you. If you’re anyone else, well, your interest in this endeavor should not rise above that of mild hobbyist.
Look. it’s baseball season right now. Or the NBA Playoffs or the Stanley Cup Playoffs, if you prefer. There is a ton of soccer/football/futbol to consumer right now.
Golf is getting going too. But it’s not football season. Period.
However, if you need a football fix, we’ve got something for you in the next section.
NFL Draft Talking Season
The NFL Draft might be a bit over-hyped, as we now live in a world where NFL mock drafts outnumber insects, but it’s still a fun event on the sports calendar. The NFL Draft is way more interesting than spring college football practice, so if you want to talk about football right now, numerous interesting storylines abound.
Take Northwestern inside linebacker Xander Mueller, as profiled in RG. He is the perfect example of how the NFL Draft makes for great theatre.
No One Should Keep Score in Spring College Football Scrimmages
Every school scores their “games” differently; with weird undecipherable scoring systems. Schools change the rules and scoring systems, not just every year, but sometimes even within the same scrimmage.
Why should any of us put in the time and effort to learn it?
I’ve been to, even covered a few spring college football spring “games,” and I can’t remember the score, or even which side “won,” in any of them.
TV networks Simply Need Something to Air
Spring college football was never even remotely considered a “spectator sport” until the explosion in the number of sports television networks. They have to air something- even if it’s utterly meaningless.
Before 2010, not many people cared about spring college football. Before 2005, almost no one did.
But hey, let’s hype up this broadcast of ninth-stringers versus seventh-stringers, half of which are wearing non-contact jerseys.
Bo Pelini Showed Us How to do Spring College Football Right
Walking out of the tunnel with a cat.
Letting cheerleaders call plays.
Giving a child stricken with illness the opportunity to run for a touchdown.
These are all things Pelini did during a spring college football scrimmage. You may not like Pelini for some of the other things he has done.
And he has been wrong on a great many number of other things, but he got this right.
He understood what spring college football is and how it should be treated- not seriously at all.
Make it a fan festival
Rebrand the spring “gam…” I can’t even type it right now, a “festival.” Call it springtime football fan fest, or something like that. Just embrace it for what it is- an excuse to tailgate, buy merch and raise donations for the NIL funds.
Plus, these unserious scrimmages give people who don’t have the means (due to ludicrously inflated ticket prices) to get in the stadium and see it.
They also get to see a football like substance as well.
Remember, spring college football, is not football, but only a football like substance. And attending it should be free, but obviously it won’t be, but hey, that’s another discussion for another time.
Paul M. Banks is the Founding Editor of The Sports Bank. He’s also the author of “Transatlantic Passage: How the English Premier League Redefined Soccer in America,” and “No, I Can’t Get You Free Tickets: Lessons Learned From a Life in the Sports Media Industry.”
He currently contributes to USA Today’s NFL Wires Network. His past bylines include the New York Daily News, Sports Illustrated and the Chicago Tribune. His work has been featured in numerous outlets, including the Wall Street Journal, Forbes, the Washington Post and ESPN. You can follow him on Linked In and Twitter.