Griffey Jr. asleep in Clubhouse, Marinerlicious days are numbered

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griffey jr.

By Paul M. Banks

MLB and Seattle Mariners icon Ken Griffey Jr. is coming dangerously close to seeing his career end. He had a chance to ride out into the sunset at the end of last season, when his Mariners teammates lifted him on their shoulders at Safeco Field last autumn. Instead, he’s pulling the whole MJ-as-a-Wizard thing; sticking around WAY TOO LONG. And now he can’t even stay awake during games. Even Jordan’s tenure in D.C. wasn’t as bad as Griff’s 2010 season.

Larry LaRue of the Tacoma News Tribune, says it’s likely Griffey will retire or be released before the month ends.

LaRue writes “have been times during games when [Griffey has] retired to the clubhouse, texted friends [and] watched the TV broadcast.” Two Mariners also reportedly told LaRue that Junior couldn’t pinch-hit last week because the 40-year-old was asleep in the clubhouse. Maybe he was either a.) in a food coma from catching the 4pm dinner special or b.) trying to rest up so he could stay awake to watch late night “Matlock” reruns.griffey jr. released

Either way, Seattle already has an aging superstar “DH” who serves absolutely no discernible purpose- his name is Mike Sweeney and he’s hitting .176 with a .208 slugging percentage. And they also have an outfielder who is really nothing more than dead weight on the roster. I’m speaking of course about the exceedingly lazy and bats#%t crazy Milton Bradley.

So why is Griffey still there? For his fielding? I still have post-traumatic stress disorder from watching him in the outfield during his tenure with the Chicago White Sox. Especially the time Ozzie let him roam the hellish landscape that is centerfield at the home of the Minnesota Twins during a crucial game down the stretch of the 2008 season. And he’s not doing anything with his bat, as he’s hitting .208 with a .234 slugging percentage, and a whopping 2 whole extra base hits this season.

Maybe they can get Eric Byrnes back? If they can convince him to leave beer league softball of course. One thing’s for sure, as the blog U.S.S. Mariner points out, a shakeout of some sort is likely coming. A team predicted by many to win the AL West shouldn’t be struggling this badly to hit the ball and win games. They even got swept by the White Sox last month, so you know it’s bad! The Sox haven’t won too many series so far in 2010. So changes in Seattle are no doubt coming.

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Comments

  1. paulmbanks says

    I’m guessing “Marinerlicious” is a state that is slightly better than Fergalicious but maybe not quite as good as Bootylicious

  2. jmccormick says

    I have that card haha

  3. paulmbanks says

    I loved “cup cards” that’s what we called Topps all-star rookies with the big golden bowl graphic on them

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