Got $969,000? Buy Carlos Zambrano’s House!

carlos zambrano

Everyone’s favorite starting pitching psychopath/sociopath hybrid Carlos Zambrano, the man who’s performance this season was a de facto heist of $19 million from the Chicago Cubs, has put his house on the market.

Let’s hope for the prospective buyer that he treated his home better than he treats his teammates/gatorade cooler/umpires/catchers/general human beings. Big Z, known for his $91 million dollar contract, and level of self-restraint that rivals your average two year old, is actually willing to take a loss on this.

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Cubs Reinstate Emotional Train Wreck Pitcher Big Z

zambrano

In a move that screams (and when talking about Big Z. you gotta use the word scream) “hey, it’s already broken, so how much more damage can he really do?”

The Chicago Cubs today reinstated right-handed pitcher Carlos Zambrano from the restricted list and kicked right-handed reliever Bob Howry to the curb.

Zambrano made four minor league appearances since being placed on the restricted list June 29 (you might recall why, when he acted like a four year old for what seems like the umpteenth time).  In the minors he helding the opponent scoreless in the first three (4.0 IP) before allowing three runs in 1.0 inning of work July 27 with Triple-A Iowa at Albuquerque. All told, he struck out five compared to one walk in 5.0 innings pitched in one game with the Rookie League Mesa Cubs and three with Iowa .

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What Clubs Would Be Cookoo for Carlos Zambrano?

PHILLIES  CUBS

By Soxman

As there is absolutely nothing else to talk about on either the North or South side of Chicago in terms of baseball this year, the focus of Chicago media has turned to “playa hatin” and speculation over off-season moves.

Aside from the phrase Alex Rios=bust being a popular topic of discussion, and the suspension of Milton Bradley for the season, there’s really only major topic of discussion- the Cubs shopping Big Z, Carlos Zambrano in the off-season. It’s been a popular topic to twitter or tweet, or whatever else it is the kids are doing nowadays.

First, I know this may sound insane or even comical, but I like Carlos Zambrano. That’s right, I admit it.  His passion and insanity, his assault on a harmless Gatorade container, his admission that his abdominals will not get him an Abecrombie endorsement any time soon, his desire to be Babe Ruth.  Would I want him on my team?  Maybe.

While his strikeouts are way down, his ERA has remained consistent the last two seasons.  He also has a career ERA of 3.52 and is still under 30 years of age.  With a no-hitter on his resume, there is some semblance of appeal.  Sure there’s also a lot not to like, the laziness, the inconsistency from one outing to the next, and a contract that’s bulkier than his ever growing waistline.

On a team full of head cases, bloated contracts and underachievers, Carlos has become lost.  While his attitude is in need of adjustment, remember what a surprise he was in 2004?  Or how in 2005, he filled the shoes of both Prior and Wood while they battled injuries much of the year (and their entire Cubs careers for that matter), to emerge as the Cubs ace?

Allegedly, Big Z would only accept a trade to the White Sox, Red Sox, or the Dodgers.  Let’s start there, but remember that trade scenarios are pure speculation.

Carlos Zambrano to the White Sox

The key here is that the Cubs are looking to trim payroll,  Big Z has said on numerous occasions that he’d love to play for fellow Venezuelan, Ozzie Guillen.  What would it take to get this deal done?

If I were a Cubs fan:

Jake Peavy would be my hope.  Peavy could waive his no trade clause as the move would not uproot his family, and the Cubs were originally one of the teams on his wish list.

As a Sox fan: soxmanonfield

A Carlos Zambrano for Alex Rios, Gavin Floyd and cash would make sense.  We get rid of a bad contract and free up enough salary to sign Chone Figgins.  The Cubs would officially have the most overpaid outfield in all of baseball. The Sox 2010 rotation would be Jake Peavy, Mark Buehrle, Carlos Zambrano, John Danks, and Freddy Garcia. Having a rotation that consists of a Cy Young award winner, one perfect game hurler and two men with no hitters would be fine by me. Realistically, there is not a fit between these two teams.

Both the Dodgers and Red Sox are no fun to speculate over because they have such great payroll flexibility- making  anything possible.If Big Z were traded to either team, I’d be looking for youth in return and salary relief.  These are two things that both clubs could offer.

Other teams you can never rule out:

-The New York Mets have indicated they will be going after another consistent pitcher in the off-season.

-The Minnesota Twins who need an ace and could be looking to make a big splash in their new stadium in 2010.  Go ahead Twins fans, rip me a new one on how this would be a salary impossibility. 

-The New York Yankees.  Because they are like the Star Trek Borg.  Resistance is futile.

-The Los Angeles Angels.  They could lose Vladimir Guerrero’s contract this off season.  Could Ervin Santana and Brandon Wood bring the Angels a solid 2010 rotation of Zambrano, Lackey (pending FA), Kazmir and Weaver?

Ok baseball fans, if not the Cubs, or a heavy workload of anger management classes, where would Big Z have the best fit?

Zambrano won’t waive no-trade clause, sources tell Chicago Tribune

Carlos Zambrano

By Jake McCormick

Would you want Carlos Zambrano on your team? That question is worth roughly $19 million a year for the next three years. On one hand, you could be getting a guy that when he’s on, is virtually unstoppable and as intimidating as any pitcher in the Major Leagues. On the other, you could need an extra supply of Gatorade coolers when he lapses into his childish tantrums and might need to create a reality show just to keep his work ethic in line with his massive contract. It’s an interesting question, but one that may be unfounded a day after the story hit its peak.

Any trade involving the Cubs supposed ace would have to be approved by him, and according to the man who initially reported the rumors, Paul Sullivan of the Chicago Tribune, Zambrano has no intention of waiving his no-trade clause. Still, this story won’t be put to rest and questions will still be asked of him and the organization until the start of the 2010 season.

carlos-zambrano-ejected-may-2009Whatever your opinion may be, it’s obvious Carlos Zambrano is to baseball as Kanye West is to music. If the Cubs truly will be shopping Zambrano this winter, they can be assured that the market isn’t exactly Roy Halladay worthy. The situation could very well play out similarly to the new South Sider, Jake Peavy, who waved his no-trade clause only after realizing he wasn’t worth as much now as he was two years ago.

Because of Zambrano’s internal deficiencies, Chicago can only realistically expect an average prospect and No. 3 or No. 4 starter in return. There are a few teams that have the money and resources to pull off a trade for a former ace that has seen his major statistical strengths (strikeouts, ground outs, WHIP) decline since that fateful 2007 contract extension.

From a theoretical perspective, the only teams that would be able to afford Zambrano’s massive salary would be the New York Yankees, New York Mets, Boston Red Sox, Los Angeles Angels and Los Angeles Dodgers. But at this point, it is all speculation as to what will happen to Big Z and will undoubtedly be the headline of the Cubs’ offseason. But if you were one of these teams, what would Zambrano be worth to you?