Time to draft another football team



By H. Jose Bosch

For as long as I can remember December brings about more than snow and long, cold nights. It also brings an exciting free agency period. No, I’m not talking about MLB’s winter meetings.

I’m talking about Lions fan free agency.

Let’s face it: being a Lions fan sucks. I’ve met fans of the Browns, Bungles and Raiders who feel sorry for me. And it’s not like any of those organizations have been glowing examples of competence in the last decade. (Well, at least Cincinnati has been OK recently)

Even Bears fans have given me a hard time. Bears fans! That’s like Jaimee Grubbs calling Jaimie Jungers a skank (like that topical reference?) But there is one saving grace from following such a horrible team: You can pick a new team to follow for the playoff push.

It’s like becoming a fan free agent.

See, by this point in the season, the Lions have managed to completely stamp out my soul, leaving me to be just an empty shell of a human being anytime I watch or read about the latest game.

So to feel any emotion while watching an NFL game, which makes watching the games fun to begin with, I pick out one of the teams that seem destined for playoff glory and root for them until they lose or win the Super Bowl.

Is it bandwagon jumping? Probably. But switching allegiances briefly just so you can enjoy the NFL playoffs shouldn’t be a crime. What should be a crime is the amount of money the Lions steal from its fans when they claim that people are paying to watch a professional football team.

What they don’t tell the fans is that the professional football team is the opponent.

loser_lionsI know Detroit just came off a losing season and two wins is an infinite improvement mathematically (I think) but that doesn’t mean I have to like it. The Lions still suck … a lot. And by the time December rolls around there is no real reason to be that invested.

At least when the Tigers were horrible there was the possibility of seeing some prospects called up at the end of the season and you could convince yourself the future was bright. What I see now with the Lions is going to be pretty much what I get next season barring a miraculous turnaround.

The thing is I like Jim Schwartz and there’s something about him that makes me think, way, way back in that tiny little brain of mine, that he can somehow turn everything around.

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  1. paulmbanks says

    You and me both…as a Bears fan, I would always do this during the 90s and much of the 2000s. this year though, with the incredibly shittastic experience at the Bears game I bought tickets to, couple with the little shits in the PR department treating me like dirt…I am done! FOR GOOD!

    The whole Jay Cutler completely sucking thing, and the fact that the collective IQ of all the receivers he throws to being about 12. was just the last straw. Not that he and the Bears suck…but because he was hailed has the 2nd coming of Jesus, and people in this town just do not shut the f— up about it.

  2. paulmbanks says

    That said I have to draft a new team. Writing about the Pats a couple years ago got me into them. and then when they were so dominant they became really fun to watch, and then it started to help my writing get noticed a lot, so I do likee them, but Ive seen what Pats fans are…and my adopting them seems, alittle too easy at best. bandwagon douchebaggery at worst.

    that guy in the interview from the mock draft suggested the Steelers, or the Saints. they both have Illini RBs so that’s a start, maybe.

    and the Skins….yeah, I guess not. but my future family, I might have to go that route

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