As Elliot Carver, the James Bond super-villain based on an unholy hybrid of Rupert Murdoch, William Randolph Hearst and Bill Gates said in Tomorrow Never Dies, “there’s no news like bad news!”
Today’s University of Illinois Athletic Department shake-up is actually great news though. Yes, lots of media outlets will spin these happenings into a “UI is a totally chaotic mess” narrative and although there’s some truth to that, Monday still marked a major step in the right direction.
This is excellent news for Illini fans. EXCELLENT! No matter what goofy hot takes you see from media people today about what mess is in Champaign-Urbana. The fact of the matter is, you have to first tear down before you can then rebuild.
Interim Chancellor Barbara Wilson and Interim Athletics Director Paul Kowalczyk gave a press conference today to comment on the new direction of Illini athletics now that former A.D. Mike Thomas has finally been dismissed. Here’s a link explaining why the Thomas Reign of Terror came to an end.
Actually, he was such a failure during his regime that here’s another link explaining why he had to be terminated, yes, even if it cost $2.5 million to do so.
So now we move forward, with 10 things we’ve learned about Illini athletics today since Thomas was jettisoned this morning, and the UI leadership met the media.
1. Bill Cubit will likely be gone at the end of the year
A new A.D. will want a new coach. More importantly, the report of abuses committed within the football program was damning enough to get both Thomas and Tim Beckman dismissed. Cubit, although he comes out clean in the report, is just too close to the situation to stay, as UI are now looking for a fresh, clean start.
2. Assembly Hall renovations come with a much warmer seat for John Groce
Illini hoops have been in the #8 vs #9 Big Ten Tournament game the past four years. Look at all the attrition heading into 2015-16 via injuries, graduation, dismissals, suspensions etc. This could easily be an 11th or 12th place team. Unless Jalen Coleman-Lands, Aaron Jordan and D.J. Williams can immediately step in and duplicate Rayvonte Rice’s production.
That’s a lot to ask of freshmen. In other words, potentially long season for hoops + coach who’s already missed consecutive NCAA tournaments (something that just doesn’t happen at Illinois) + new A.D. = Groce needs a big time performance this season in order to keep his gig in 2016-17.
3. The University of Illinois has a ton of sunk costs in the athletic department
As they teach in business school 101, “don’t throw good money after bad.” Well, Mike Thomas at Illinois is Exhibit A of what NOT to do with your undergraduate degree in business (Colorado St. ’83).
#Illini athletic payments for people not working: Ron Zook (2.6 mil), Bruce Weber (3.9 mil). Jolette Law (620K), Mike Thomas (2.5 mil)
— Matt Wettersten (@MattWettersten) November 9, 2015
4. An interim A.D. and an interim Chancellor will determine the fate of an interim football coach and his successor
Ok, that’s a ton of instability, and none of us actually know how all this will play out. However, we just saw Michigan hire Jim Harbaugh under somewhat similar circumstances, so good things can occur under chaotic circumstances; sometimes.
5. Illinois might finally be getting serious about having legitimate revenue-producing sports again
As Wilson said in the presser “athletics can be the front porch to your University.” She then quickly brought up her background with the University of Wisconsin.
That’s on fleek as the Badgers, in both sports, are the perfect role model for Illinois right now. UW is also the ceiling, but hey, can’t you feel a brand new day?
Even the youngest of Illini fans have vivid memories of Wisconsin going to three Big ten title games and three Rose Bowls in football. In basketball, they’re the UEFA Champions League of the Big Ten as Bo Ryan has never finished outside the top four in any of his seasons at UW.
6. The Illini-Mizzou Hoops Game needs a re-brand instead of “the Braggin’ Rights Game” this season
Mizzou, Mike Thomas, and other related terms were all top ten trending nationally on Twitter this morning. That’s because the University of Missouri President was forced to resign due to the #ConcernedStudent1950 protests/grad student hunger strike/football team work stoppage.
The Mizzou and Illini news broke at the same time, meaning we need a re-brand for the late December college hoops game. Here are a couple ideas to get the ball rolling:
https://twitter.com/bartenderradio/status/663803420881592320
@PaulMBanks I suggest a new trophy – A university administration building on fire.
— JP ??? (@jjhparker) November 9, 2015
7. Interim A.D.’s Coaching search begins now
Kowalczyk said that the football coaching search won’t start until after the season ends. Whether he really means that or not is irrelevant. He may not change that position publicly, but I guarantee that someone swayed him to change that position privately by his lunch hour.
There are over a dozen other college football gigs opening up. He who hesitates is lost. No chance at landing Justin Fuente, Dino Babers or any other worthy candidate if you wait around until Christmas time. Start your holiday shopping now!
8. Mike Thomas has an even better agent than Richard Pitino
As Wilson said “I’m grateful for the graceful way Thomas stepped down from his position.”
Well, if I got paid $2.5 million not to work I’d be graceful too! I’d be a regular Michael Flatley. Thomas hired Brian Kelly at Cincinnati and then accomplished what else exactly?…….Pitino the Younger took Minnesota to a NIT “title” and also accomplished……*crickets chirping*…… to get that long, lucrative extension in Minneapolis. He’ll make $1.6 million per year, until 2019 as a reward for his 14-22 Big Ten record and no NCAA Tournament berths.
“Great work if you can get it,” right? Or as Dark Helmet said in Spaceballs “smoke ’em if you got ’em.”
@PaulMBanks pic.twitter.com/fcvePsnwFt
— Shane Nicholson (@ofvoid) November 9, 2015
9. The Illini football head coaching gig is 10 times more attractive than it was at this time yesterday
It was a very poorly kept secret that top tier coaching talent was often turned off by Thomas. That’s why the Illini had to settle for hiring Beckman and Groce, who weren’t exactly the first choices on their list. Well, that obstacle is removed now.
10. You have a bowl game to look forward to, Illini fans this year
As the 007 franchise has taught us: “You’re judged by the power of your enemies.” And ESPN projects the Illini versus USC in a bowl game. That might one up the 2011 Illini vs UCLA “Our Coaches are Fired Bowl” by giving us a new “Athletic Department Instability Bowl.”
That’s enough Illini negativity for now.
Illinois fired the football coach a week before the season started. They terminated the A.D. a week before hoops season started. This symmetry shows that a rebuild is underway.
You saw the football team play with a bit of a “Colbert Bump” after Beckman was canned. Now expect a similar surge on the heels of today’s news. They’ll win at least one of these last three and gain bowl eligibility. Here’s the link to the latest Illini bowl projections.
Hey, in August you would have considered a bowl berth this season to be a very pleasant surprise.
Paul M. Banks owns, operates and sometimes writes The Sports Bank.net, which is partnered with FOX Sports Engage Network. The website is also featured on News Now.
Banks, a former writer for the Washington Times, currently contributes to the Chicago Tribune RedEye. He also appears regularly on numerous television and radio talk shows all across the country. Catch him Tuesdays on KOZN 1620 The Zone.
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