Minnesota Timberwolves Will Be the Worst Team in the NBA

David Kahn Ricky Rubio

David Kay begins his 2010-2011 NBA previews with the worst team in the league.  The Minnesota Timberwolves are giving new meaning to the phrase re-building behind oft-criticized general manager David Kahn who is the opposite of Benjamin Linus when it comes to having a plan.

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The Wolves Got Kahned

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“The greatest trick the devil ever pulled, was convincing the world he didn’t exist”

By Peter Christian

That is a line from one of my favorite movies of all time and has recently been running through in my head over and over. Not because I have an inkling to watch “The Usual Suspects” but because a man that I believe to be more divinely stupid and evil than anyone -other than Bernie Madoff or Spencer Pratt- struck again. David Kahn just picked up his limp and revealed himself to be the true Keyser Soze. The final straw has been broken.

Any faith I had left in the Timberwolves front office in taking steps towards turning their current puddle of piss situation around went away with the relatively minor signing by Philadelphia of Timberwolves free agent Rodney Carney. On its own, the official departure of Carney would have meant nothing to me (OK that’s not true, I really liked Carney last year and thought he could have been a good wing option for a team really thin in that area), but it was just another piece of evidence that David Kahn (Timberwolves VP of Basketball Ops since the end of May) is completely void of logic, basketball knowledge and any semblance of a plan whatsoever. Every Wolves headline has been proof that Kahn is a first class buffoon that has no business making a decision of which brand of toothpaste to buy, let alone being the sole man in charge of rebuilding the joke of a basketball team that the Minnesota Timberwolves have become.

It started with the way he handled the booting of Kevin McHale, continued with the trade of Randy Foye and Mike Miller for a stock pile of bad contracts and the 5th pick in the draft. At face value that trade could have been a winner. Instead Kahn sullied the situation by drafting the best point guard who’s already proved he can play with the best of the NBA by then following up and taking another top billed point guard. Instead of being in a position to have some youthful talent at two positions, Kahn loaded up at the same position and pissed off the prospect with a higher ceiling so much that he didn’t even come to the team.

Then there was the coach hired to run an offense that he hasn’t ever coached, the trade of three fan favorites for a player that filled a weakness and also gave the team another expiring contract and then the re-trade of that player for another expiring contract but at a position that helps the team about as much as I need an eyeball on the arch of my left foot. 86343355JP006_DRAFTPORTRAITS

In short, Kahn has turned a 24 win team that struggled to fill seats last year into a team that will be lucky to win 20 games and can’t even sell $5 seats. The Timberwolves owner Glen Taylor should be ready to go Mt. St. Helens on Kahn’s ass as he is prepping the team to lose more money than it has ever lost since Taylor bought the team in 1994. He should also be pissed as hell that Kahn turned two very valuable assets into a prospect that wants no part of the team. And David Kahn took on three turds with bad contracts to boot. Yet somehow has remained mum. I know if it was my money that Kahn was pissing away I’d be beating him with a rubber hose and throwing rocks at his teeth right now.
Worse than everything is Kahn’s arrogant attitude. In every interview he has given since being hired on May 22nd 2009 (when we started listening to the tale that Verbal Kint/Keyser Soze started spinning) Kahn has spoken to the interviewer as if they were a 4 year old child with a learning disability. If Kahn spoke to me like that, I would pull his eyeballs out through his earholes. I know I’m no NBA GM, but I know at least 2 dozen people who are able to hold their own in a conversation about basketball better than Kahn can.

Kahn may have fooled Glen Taylor and a select few of the media here in Minnesota, but not me. I know that his last name is simply just a phonetically spelled pronunciation of what he is trying to do to the Timberwolves. He messed up the Ricky Rubio situation so badly that it will be at least 2 years until he plays for the Wolves, but probably more (if at all) and if he is planning on just using his rights as an asset for another trade (if he does that it will screw up the franchise even more). Because it will be at the lowest point of Rubio’s value.

Kahn’s plan to build a winning basketball team has about as much chance to succeed as Gary Coleman in an Olympic High Jump event. He apparently never grasped the concept of “Buy Low, Sell High” and we should probably thank our lucky stars that he isn’t a manager of a hedge fund, a mutual fund advisor or a financial planner. In less than four months he has killed the Timberwolves chances at improving from last year. Remember, at one point Minnesota was one of the hottest teams in basketball before Al Jefferson got hurt. Kahn has completely demoralized any fan base that was left after the last couple seasons of suck with a completely illogical theory of “Buy High, Sell Low.”

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I don’t know what kind of screw job the Timberwolves/Glen Taylor put on Kahn in his former life, but he is returning the favor with gusto now. Keyser Soze would be proud.

Face It, Rubio Doesn’t Want to Play for T-Wolves

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By: David Kay

Timberwolves general manager David Kahn didn’t just throw Ricky Rubio under the bus.  He slammed his head in the bus door a few times, drove over Rubio, shifted to reverse, ran him over again, leaned out the window to spit on him, then floored the bus over him again.  This continually developing story should be as interesting to follow as the Brett Favre/Packers circus of the summer of 2008.

12 hours after it was reported that the fifth overall pick in this year’s NBA Draft would be staying in Spain, Kahn came out and tried to save face in hopes of limiting the amount of backlash he would receive for not getting Rubio in a T-Wolves jersey this up-coming season.  Kahn released a statement Monday morning stating that a buy out was reached between Rubio and his Spanish team DKV Joventut, that would allow the 18-year old to come to the NBA.  Instead, Rubio backed out of the deal, deciding that he would be better served staying home and playing two years for FC Barcelona.  In other words, Kahn is saying, “I did all I could to get this kid in a T-Wolves jersey this season, but this punk doesn’t want to play for us.”

Rubio also released a brief statement: “The reason leading me to take this next step is to have a period of preparation to better take the challenge of the NBA in better conditions as a player. The Minnesota Timberwolves continue to be my first option and I wish to play with them in the near future.”

I’m not buying that for a minute Ricky.  If it were the Knicks or Clippers that drafted you and had worked out a reasonable buy out from your Spanish team, you would be playing in the NBA this season.  But since you ended up in a less-than-desirable market by your standards, you suddenly felt you needed more time to season your game overseas.

rubiosternAt no time during the draft process was there any talk of Rubio not being “NBA-ready.”  He had been playing in one of the toughest European leagues since he was 14-years old and flashed signs of his ability against the world’s best in the 2008 Summer Olympics.  There were questions about his transitioning to the more physical NBA game, but how is spending two more years in Spain going to better prepare you for the physicality of the Association?

I’m starting to think Rubio will never play for the Timberwolves.  Kahn keeps saying he is willing to wait for the summer of 2011 when Rubio has the option to leave Barcelona without having to pay any buy out.  Rubio claims he is still committed to play for Minnesota.  But if that is indeed still his “first option” then why wait?  It just doesn’t make any sense.

Barring a miraculous turnaround in Minnesota, I don’t see this ending well for Kahn and company.  The possibility of dealing Rubio’s rights for some pieces to help their re-building may be the best option at this point and save us all from the soap opera that will assuredly continue during the next two years.  Otherwise, we will be forced to suffer through the same situation in two years with Rubio reluctant to call the Twin Cities “home.”

Kahn wrote in his statement, “I wished Ricky well and told him that, while I could not predict the future, I expected to see him in Minnesota soon.”  Don’t hold your breath Mr. Kahn.  Just keep driving the bus.

Rubio Staying in Spain

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by: David Kay

Timberwolves general manager David Kahn can finally stop racking up all those frequent flyer miles.  After months of trying to figure out a way for Ricky Rubio to play for Minnesota this season, the negotiations and trips overseas to Spain have gone for naught.  Monday night, Yahoo! Sports reported the Spanish sensation’s rights were traded from DKV Joventut to FC Barcelona, meaning Rubio will likely not be coming to the NBA until the summer of 2011 when his contract doesn’t require a buyout for him to head to the U.S.

Financially, Rubio just didn’t have the means to buy himself out of the $8.11 million remaining on his contract.  Kahn just ventured to Spain for a third time this summer to try and work out a way to lower the buyout, something that DKV Joventut was reportedly receptive to doing.  But in the end, a deal could not be resolved, thus putting off Rubio’s dream of playing in the NBA and adding to Kahn’s already dubious reputation as an NBA GM.rubiostern

This puts the finishing touches on what has been a disastrous off-season for the T-Wolves.  They ultimately turned Randy Foye, Mike Miller, Sebastian Telfair, Craig Smith, Mark Madsen, and five draft picks into Jonny Flynn, Wayne Ellington, Darius Songaila, Oleksy Pecherov, Mark Blount, Damien Wilkins, Chucky Atkins, the possibility of Ricky Rubio playing for them in 2011, and a little bit of cap space for next off-season.  Even Grizzlies’ general manager Chris Wallace is laughing right now.

This leaves Minnesota with quite the conundrum.  Does Kahn sit on Rubio’s rights for the next two years, hoping that the 18-year playmaker will come to the Land of 10,000 Lakes to play for the T-Wolves, or does Kahn try to trade his rights to gain assets that will help the franchise’s re-building process right away?

Kahn obviously knew that there was a possibility that Rubio wouldn’t be playing in a Timberwolves uniform this season and has been quoted as saying that the team is willing to wait for Rubio.  Barring a ridiculous offer from another team, I cannot see his rights being traded.  Then again, this is David Kahn we’re talking about so anything is possible.

It is also no secret that Rubio has not been overly-excited about beginning his NBA career in Minnesota.  Playing two more years in Spain will only increase the likelihood of Rubio demanding a trade to a bigger market where he can rake in more cash off endorsements or threaten to remain overseas until Kahn finally gives in.

If there’s any positive that comes out of this situation, at least the Wolves will land one of the top picks in the 2010 NBA Draft and can hopefully add another young player to develop so when/if Rubio does call Minnesota home, the franchise will be ready to turn things around.