Blackhawks triumph helps Chicago recover from Great Fire of 1871 (SATIRE)

chicago fire

With every postseason win, the Chicago Blackhawks take another step towards drinking the blessed waters residing within Lord Stanley’s Cup. The possibility of tasting these pure waters lifts the spirits of Windy City Citizens still yearning for a ray of light to guide them through the dark devastation brought on by the Great Chicago Fire in October of 1871.

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Blackhawks Stanley Cup helps Chicago recover from Fire of 1871 (parody)

chicago fire

(note: this opening paragraph is obviously parody)

With a win tonight the Chicago Blackhawks will take another step towards drinking the blessed waters residing within Lord Stanley’s Cup. With just five more wins, the tasting of these pure waters will lift the spirits of Windy City citizens still yearning for a ray of light to get them through the dark devastation brought on by the Great Chicago Fire in October of 1871.

Every Brian Bickell goal is yet another opportunity to make Chicago residents forget about that fateful lantern, kicked over by Mrs. O’Leary’s cow that led to doom and destruction. Every point scored by Blackhawks leader Jonathan “Captain Serious” Toews is another chance to alleviate the serious and somber mood possessed by many who lost everything in the second city’s historical inferno.

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