Butler vs. UConn: National Championship Drinking Game

brad stevens butler

Welcome to the third annual NCAA Tournament Championship Drinking Game, one of our favorite articles every year here at The Sports Bank.  If you missed our first two editions, you can check the 2009 Michigan State vs. North Carolina version and last year’s Butler vs. Duke one.

Even if you do not have a rooting interest in tonight’s game between Butler and UConn, invite some friends over, buy a heck of a lot of booze, follow our drinking rules, and it will be as much fun as if your own team was playing.

Our lawyer insists we add the following: The Sports Bank is not responsible for anyone dumb enough to actually try this and the harm to his/her body that would certainly occur if this game was played.  If you are idiotic enough to attempt keeping pace with this game, please have your local emergency room on stand-by and do not drink and drive.  Thank you.

By: David Kay and Peter Christian
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NCAA Championship Drinking Game

By: David K. and Peter Christian

Do you really have zero interest in watching the NCAA Tournament Championship between North Carolina and Michigan State?  Neither do David K. and Peter Christian.  But rather than spurning the title game to watch a below-average season of 24, play our NCAA Championship Drinking Game.  Brackets Busted?  Who cares, get completely and utterly inebriated thanks to the likes of Lupe Izzo and Tyler Hansbrough!

Anytime one of the following events occurs during the game, take the required amount of drinks:

If CBS shows a cutaway shot of Lupe Izzo or Magic Johnson in the crowd: one drink

If Magic Johnson exhales and his gut rips through his too tight State shirt: waterfall

If Lupe Izzo shows any sense of emotion as to what is taking place on the court: down a bottle of rubbing alcohol

If Tyler Hansbrough is referred to as “Psycho-T”: have your friends give you a shower using the Franzia wine spigot as your shower head

If you see Tyler Hansbrough blink: body shot off the hairiest guy in the room

If Tyler Hansbrough does any sort of fist or arm pump: bong a beer, then jump off the roof of a house into a pool

If Tyler Hansbrough “sprites” a dunk (definition of sprite: get stuffed by the rim or have the ball bounce wildly off the back of the rim):  pretend to do a shot of gin, but instead throw it in the person’s face sitting next to you

If Travis Walton is referred to as the Big Ten’s Defensive Player of the Year or Kailin Lucas as the Big Ten Player of the Year: shotgun a can of PBR

If Jim Nantz refers to The Masters as “a tradition unlike any other”: drink a glass of scotch

If Clark Kellogg cackles at a dumb Jim Nantz line: four jell-o shots

If Jim Nantz references that the UNC players returned to school to get to this point: shot of tequila sans lime and salt

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If it’s mentioned that this game is being played about 90 miles from MSU’s campus: shot of Fleischman’s vodka

If the first UNC-Michigan State game is mentioned: double shot of Boone’s Farm

If Michigan State wins: run to the bar, buy a round of Jager, and put it on Paul M. Banks tab

If Michigan State wins and Tyler Hansbrough cries: pop a bottle of Cristal

If North Carolina wins: drive to Minneapolis, buy shots of SoCo and lime for Peter until he blacks out and forgets UNC won

If you cry during “One Shining Moment”: chug a bottle of Puckers until you throw up

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