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Bama suspends Ha Ha Clinton-Dix; LOL Weiner-Sext still eligible

October 2, 2013 By paulmbanks

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The Alabama Crimson Tide have suspended DB Ha Ha Clinton-Dix indefinitely. His given name his Ha’Sean Clinton-Dix, but he goes by Ha Ha. I’m assuming fictional defensive back LOL Weiner-Sext is still eligible for this college football season.

So why was Ha Ha Clinton-Dix suspended?

That information is not out yet. Nick Saban only said that same exact phrase all college football teams use when they suspend someone. You know it, you hate it, so I’m not going to bother repeating the phrase that never pays.

Ha Ha Clinton-Dix was the number one rated DB in his recruiting class. And he’s second on the Crimson Tide in tackles right now. He was on track to be a first round NFL Draft pick. Of course, this suspension won’t exactly help his draft stock. Still despite all his potential as a star player, none of that will overshadow his given name.

Namewise Ha Ha Clinton-Dix is right up there with college football players Hingle McCringleberry, Fudge, and LeCarpetron Dookmarriot. Of course, those three players don’t actually exist. They’re characters in a Key & Peele sketch.

Paul M. Banks is the owner of The Sports Bank.net, an affiliate of Fox Sports. An analyst for 95.7 The Fan and 1620 The Zone, he also writes for Chicago Now. Follow him on Twitter (@paulmbanks) and Facebook, subscribe to his RSS feed

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