From A Bears Fan’s Perspective…


I had to work today. Until 7:30.

I made a decision early on that I would try to work through my shift and not find out what happened.

Somehow, beyond all odds, I made it through without finding out what happened.

I have to be honest though, had someone told me what happened…I wouldn’t have believed them.

Honestly…I’m not even sure I believe what I just watched.  As a sports fan, as a Chicagoan, and quite frankly, as a human being, you’re just not prepared to say, “Caleb Hanie just led the Bears on a 70 yard touchdown drive in the fourth quarter of the NFC Championship game to bring the Bears within one score.”

I just typed it after watching it. I’m not even sure I still believe it.

And here’s the really crazy part…he did it TWICE.

First off…let’s congratulate myself for somehow making it through an 8 and a half hour shift at work without finding out the result. Seriously.  It was a yeoman’s effort, and I think I gave myself an ulcer, and quite frankly I’m not even sure I enjoyed the game, but man…I did it.

To the game, here are my quick hit impressions…

Fuck off, Jay Cutler. You hurt your knee bad enough to not play? In the NFC Championship Game?? Seriously? Fuck. You. Go home. Don’t come back.

I just heard Lovie on TV say you hurt it on the last series…but you still don’t know when you hurt it?  Yeah. Fuck off.

Also, ummm…Todd Collins? Go away. It’s not your fault, but you’re old and not capable anymore. Ride off into the sunset.

Caleb Hanie? Bravo. You wanted to play. You really wanted to play. You wanted to come out and give your all for the big C on that helmet. And you did…and you damn near brought the team all the way back. You haven’t taken snaps with the first team all season, and…damn, kid. Seriously.

Hats off to the defense for rallying back. Completely overmatched early on, you guys battled back and really turned this game around…and Brian Urlacher, I’m sorry for saying that you were done. You’re not. You were a goddamn beast today. A freaking beast.

Tim Jennings wins the crown for the goat of the game. Which is amazing, because of how big of a pussy Jay Cutler was. Seriously Tim…if you’re a fucking cornerback on this Bears team next year, I won’t watch one game. Not a single one. And no Bear fan should, either.

To the Bears coaching staff…you guys effed up.  Seriously. That timeout on third down on the last drive when you were handing off to Forte was TERRIBLE. TERRIBLE. That was a GREAT play call. And then you call the end around? Really?  And then DON’T use your last time out to come up with a better play than that slant?  It was like the stoned sister from “Mike and Molly” played by Katy Mixon was calling plays at the end of the game.

In the end…I said at the beginning of the season that the Bears would win four games, and the high-end-upside was they would win 6.

Now, I just watched them play in the NFC Championship game.

That should leave me feeling great but…I am just confused. I drank many, many Busch Lights before it happened, but I don’t think there is a “drunk enough” to deal with Caleb Hanie as your quarterback in the NFC Championship game…In all seriousness, I’m still having trouble thinking about it.

There’s tons to be proud of for the Bears, but one major question looms, with Jay Cutler.

Can he be the quarterback? Is he tough enough? Does he even care?

And I’ll be honest…I don’t know. And I’m drunk and too confused to care right now, honestly.

I suppose I should congratulate Packer fans, although I feel like if Caleb Hanie can do what he did, you’re probably just sacrificial lambs for the Steelers anyway…which sucks, because I felt like the AFC was really overrated this season.

But still…what a ride for the Bears…and what a weird, wild end to a weird, wild season. No other way for it to go, right?

Paul Schmidt is a senior contributor and media relations director for the Sports Bank, and is entering his tenth year of writing about sports in Chicago and Illinois. You can reach him via email here.


  1. well, congrats to you for making it through the day without hearing the score that is amazing! seriously, that’s very talented.

    but your effort in keywording and SEO tagging here….not so much.

    anyways, I loved Haine’s pornstache, ad the fact that he shaved it off before talking to the media. he realized that if he was going to be on national tv, it;s best he not look like jeff kent

  2. NO WAY that Cutler injury isn’t serious. no fucking way. The Bears brass would say get your ass in there you pussy, this what we pay you for. Go earn your pay.

    impossible that he could sit this out with a minor injury. If Urlacher defends his toughness, the same #54 who called ’em out last year- then I’m cool with Cutler and what he did today.

    why they’re fucking not telling us his injury though is rather fucked up. But let’s hear what it is.

    And yes Todd Collins is a retarded vagina, and should never be allowed anywhere near a NFL stadium in any capacity again

  3. I’m sure his injury is serious. Mostly sure. Well….kinda sure.

    But he better have a torn ligament. And require surgery. Because that’s what it would have taken most any person in Chicago to keep them off the field for the second half of the NFC title game. Seriously, he’s killing me.

  4. And I’m too drunk to SEO tag. But not too drunk to proofread and spell check.

    But still…not drunk enough to understand Caleb Hanie at QB. I don’t think that level of drunk exists.

  5. what did phillip rivers play with in the afc title game?

  6. Philip Rivers played with a torn ACL, but even if Jay Cutler did play in the second half, who says the Bears would have had a chance? It’s not like he did much in his ten full quarters versus the Packers in 2010-11.

    Yes, complement Caleb Hanie for coming in and attacking a tired Packers defense who had no idea who the guy was. Put Hanie in there from the beginning with some scouting and he doesn’t do nearly as well. Oh yeah, he also threw two interceptions if you don’t remember those, they were pretty crucial.

    And yes once again, the Packers are for sure a sacrificial lamb for the Steelers. It’s not like they embarrassed those Amazing #1-seeded dirty-birds in a dome who are in the “not overrated” NFC. It’s alright though, the Packers are very lucky to not be down by more than seven all season and only lose their six games by four points or less.

  7. Justin Mertes-Mistretta says

    Gotta say, this piece is awesome. The fact that Cutler was able to walk around and showed no fight to go back in is disturbing. It’s tough not to question his toughness after that, regardless of what Urlacher says.

  8. The AFC is NOT overrated…but that said I still think GB can take the Steelers, I think they have a decent shot.

    I know why people are assuming Cutler is a pussy here, I actually wrote an essay a couple months ago on the very topic that’s inspriing this. I’ll update, revise and re-post in the morning.

    I’m tired now.

  9. Justin Mertes-Mistretta says

    I completely agree with you, Nick.

    Sacrificial lambs? Is that why the Packers are favored by 2.5 points as of right now?

    What is it that Caleb Hanie did exactly? He threw a pick-six and a game-ending INT. He exceeded expectations, but that’s not too difficult when you’re expected to go 3-and-out every series. Take away two big pass plays and he did nothing more than dink-and-dunk passes.

    Bring on Pittsburgh, Super Bowl here we come!

  10. I thought you were a Vikings fan. or a Favre fan? que???

    and Favre’s a whiny little bitch for saying the defense is the team’s mvp. gushing over the d and saying nothing about Rodgers

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