Capt. Neckbeard Kyle Orton entering biggest game of his career


kyle orton

Kyle Orton, or “Captain Neckbeard” as local sports talk radio use to refer to him faces the biggest opportunity of his NFL career- win and you’re in. Dallas Cowboys QB Tony Romo is getting an epidural injection, back problems have ruled him out for the season. Although Cowboys Owner Jerry Jones and his little yes man Jason Garrett are still hanging on to hopes of otherwise. Regardless of who starts, Cowboys face the Eagles in Sunday Night Football on NBC, in a true de facto playoff game.

RELATED: prominent LGBT website claims evidence that will confirm Aaron Rodgers gay rumors.

RELATED: Jay Cutler likely parting ways with the Chicago Bears

Ol’ Neckbeard may have given himself a shave since his days leading the Chicago Bears, but he’s still not great at playing the quarterback position at the highest level. Kyle Orton was also known for getting drunk during his days in Chicago, and letting himself get photographed in public being homeless level drunk.

Look at the this picture from the Twitter account of CBS Chicago blogger Tim Baffoe.


In 2005, Kyle Orton was rushed into the Bears starting lineup as a rookie after a preseason injury to starter Rex Grossman, and the disgustingly putrid play of back-up Chad Hutchinson. Orton started 15 games, and was then replaced by Sexy Rexy after halftime in the Bears’ Week 15 victory against the Atlanta Falcons. After sitting for Week 16, Kyle Orton started the regular season finale, Week 17, against the Minnesota Vikings. The was an exhibition game, as it had no playoff implications. The much embattled Grossman then started for the Bears in their only post-season game; a loss to the Carolina Panthers.


Overall, the Bears had a record of 10-5 in games that Capt Neckbeard started, including an eight-game winning streak after a 1-3 start. Kyle Orton finished with the lowest quarterback rating in the NFL (59.7) among all “qualified” quarterbacks (those with 224+ pass attempts). Yes, dead last. Kyle Orton was dead last in passer rating. Later, he became the Bears’ third-string quarterback, and did not see any action throughout the entire 2006 season. The Brian Griese signing demoted him. The Purdue product didn’t do much in ’07, but had a solid starting season with the Bears in ’08. His passing numbers were much much better.

Still he was traded for Jay Cutler.


I’m sure Kyle Orton has matured and settled down since his wild young partying days in Chicago. But that doesn’t mean we still can’t look at all these pictures and have a good laugh. Orton just happened to have his “boys will be boys” phase at a time when Deadspin, With Leather were starting to hit their stride. And social media was beginning to take off. Kyle Orton was Kaner before Kaner only because of communication technology taking off. Imagine if Instagram and Twitter existed when Mickey Mantle were in their binge drinking in Manhattan nightclub primes?


Anyways, back to football, Orton was traded to Denver for Jay Cutler, and he had a couple great seasons as a starter there. Then he was dealt to Kansas City where he was benched. Now he’s in Dallas and a back-up. Former NFL star QB and current CBS analyst Rich Gannon on Kyle Orton


“This is a guy that has been in the League for nine years. He has 69 starts under his belt. He knows how to prepare. He knows what the expectations are… Kyle Orton throws the ball well. He has a good enough arm to make all the throws. The thing that concerns me a little bit with Kyle Orton, he has never started a playoff game. This is going to be like a playoff game and if they’re able to win, he’s going to get his first ever start in a playoff game. So it’s different. It’s a different speed. It’s a different tempo. The other thing that concerns me about Kyle Orton, if you really study his career, it’s the three of four poor decisions that seem to creep into his game that really hurt him and the team. That’s what he has to avoid in the coming week.”


Paul M. Banks is the owner of The Sports, an affiliate of Fox Sports. He’s also an analyst for multiple news talk radio stations across the country; with regular weekly segments on NBC and Fox Sports Radio. Follow him on Twitter (@paulmbanks) and RSS Catch him Tuesdays talking Illini and Northwestern for KOZN 1620 The Zone, Fridays talking Chicago Bears for WAOR 95.7 The Fan

Speak Your Mind