Take It To The Bank, College Football Week 3

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So I was sitting at the book at the Las Vegas Hilton over the weekend, and it was just like old times.

“Louie!!!”

“Hey, Louie, what’s cracking?”

“SECURITY!!!”

Now, maybe I groped that woman, maybe I didn’t. I’m an old man, and my mind ain’t what it used to be.

I do know, and I can say with absolute certainty…that those puppies were real. True story.

Now look, I don’t objectify women, but if they decide to come up to me, on a day where I am undefeated and making moneywell…I guess that money can be used as bail money too, huh?  Who’s with me?

I still got out with a slap on the wrist. Looks like fortune smiled down on ol’ Louie.

Maybe you can be just like me, Lucky. Heaven knows I was last week, now your chance to be Lucky like me.

By “Lucky” Louie Esposito

In case you missed it, one more time, just click here and see: 6-0 last week.  And I took some mocking from all of you last week. But it’s like I told Peter Lawford one night in 1961 when we were stumbling back to The Sands…”One day, your son Chris is gonna be on a soap opera.” And he slugged me, sure. I couldn’t see outta my left eye for a week.

But dammit all if I wasn’t right.

What was I talking about?

Oh, right, college football.

6-0.

Let’s do it again this week.

OK…so here’s the thing.  I’m told it was hard for some of you to read last week’s picks. I’m old and I could figure it out, but, you know, whatever. We’ll simplify it for you.

The team Lucky is picking is in bold. Go bet on that team.

If you like money or something.

Illinois -7 against Northern Illinois — Now look. I know I get a little scratch from Mr. Banks, the guy who runs this site. And I know that Illinois is his alma something or another. Hello mater. I don’t know.  But anyway, that don’t matter in this pick. Northern Illinois is not a good team. They caught a whuppin’ on the road against Iowa State, they damn near lost to North Dakota at home. I think that Illinois can handle a team that almost lost to North Dakota at home by more than a TD, you know what I’m saying?

USC -12 at Minnesota — I don’t have a lot of rules. One of them is, when a good team is going to play a team that just lost to South Dakota, and is only laying 12 points, you should take the points.  I’ve got this locked in here, but take note, I’ve seen this line dropping and as low as 11 points already. I’m just saying…

Oklahoma -17 against Air Force — The over might be the more appropriate bet here (at 54.5) because Air Force likes to score too. But after cashing in that little Oklahoma ticket last week, I think I’m letting it ride against an inferior opponent. Air Force is not as good as Florida State.  They will lose by more than Florida State.

Iowa PICK at Arizona — This right here is your most inexplicable line of the week. Arizona’s an all right football team, but Iowa…ain’t people talking about them being a national title contender? Then I don’t care if they are on the road, they should be laying some points.  It seems like the books are DARING you to take Iowa here…you should call them on it.

Arkansas at Georgia, OVER 54 points — I truthfully like Arkansas getting three points here too, but I think the over is the play. These teams played one of the most entertaining games of the year last year, and combined for almost 100 points. At the very least, BANG THIS OVER. If you’re daring…I know I am…let’s bet the parlay: Over 54 points and Arkansas +2.5.

You heard them all here first. Make your bets accordingly, as these are the games I like this week.

I’m Lucky. You wanna be Lucky? Listen to me.

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  1. Hello mater. Hello fater. Greetings from Camp Hiawater.

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