Call-Out of the Year: The Nominees
By Peter Christian
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It’s been quite a 1st year for the Call-Outs. We had our name and main idea stolen by the people of Democrats.org, we were tweeted “Shame on you” back in August by someone named Cody Crossman (no word as to what for), we attempted to start a bit of an internet rivalry with the hack over at Miller Park Drunk (he declined to counter my attack) and we even stopped our tradition of calling out the Oklahoma City Thunder week after week (because let’s be honest, the Timberwolves make the Thunder look like the ’72 Lakers).
Most of all however, we’ve had a good time poking fun at the idiots and douches of the world each week. With the year winding down its time to take a peek at the pared down list of nominees who are vying for the undisputed title of “Call-Out of the Year.”
NFL
With Roger Goodell’s lame ass “Player Conduct Policy” that is about as effective as a condom that lost a fight with a hole punch and the league’s consistently awful and inconsistent officiating they were a good bet to make the list of nominations. Sprinkle in a handful of other poor decisions (designing the Super Bowl XLIII hats to look like Seahawks hats as Steelers donned them, moving the Pro Bowl to Miami and playing it before the Super Bowl, etc.) and the NFL is a near lock to be a finalist.
Rick Reilly
He hates on bloggers, internet writers and any form of new media. He is an arrogant prick that thinks his way is better simply because it’s “his way.” He is lazy as hell and even cops to it as he simply re-publishes his own essays from past years and former employers and is completely unwilling to admit he’s a first class douche that no one wants to hear from ever again. Ever.
Kanye West
Kanye’s lust for the spotlight and complete lack of an impulse filter in his brain has made him a poster boy of loud mouth douches in our society. His void of tact at the VMA’s this year will go down as one of the most unacceptable public outbursts of all time (yes, even worse than “George Bush hates black people”).
Peter King
Remember why Peter King has a job and is still considered credible? Me neither. Prior to the season Peter yet again tried to show why he has a job as an NFL Insider by posting his NFL Power Rankings, only to yet again be made to look foolish. A 5 year old could do his job. Seriously.
Real World/ Murray-Bunim Productions
The two Real World seasons to air during 2009 were borderline awful (even with the Cancun season having such promise) mainly because the casts were made up of people that 98% of Americans would dislike. Outside of Ryan Conklin (RW: Brooklyn) the casts were made up of people who were either uninteresting or just plain bad at life. The upcoming Real World: Washington D.C. (premiering on Dec. 30th) doesn’t have much promise either.
Heene Family/Balloon Boy
Creating a publicity stunt in which the entire world thinks the safety of a young child is in danger is enough to make people upset. Finding out it was just a hoax in an effort to secure a starring role in a reality show is sickening. There aren’t enough eggs to the face and paintballs to the crotch in the world to make those parents feel the proper level of humiliation they deserve.
NBC
Between truly despicable NHL coverage (which featured an inability to figure out how to set up their cameras so the audience could see the puck 100% of the time), terrible show development and being completely out of touch with what the viewing public wants, NBC has the title of “Worst Over the Air Network” in the bag. That’s all before even mentioning the decision to green light “The Jay Leno Show.”
Jay Cutler
First came his cry-baby performance in Denver, then came the forced trade to Chicago and now he’s been exposed as a really bad quarterback that throws a ton of interceptions and makes a really punchable pouty face (full with double chin) on the sideline. Bruce Pearl would have a better chance of making friends in the state of Illinois right now.
Tiger Woods
Fastest fall from decency ever. Faster than OJ Simpson. See you in the finals Tiger.
Comcast
The cable/ISP giant treats its customers like crap, over charges for its services, starts fights with competitors over money then shells out $6 billion to buy the aforementioned “Worst Over the Air Network.” If there ever was to be a corporation that would be a cover for a Dr. Evil like operation, Comcast would be it.
Jon & Kate Gosselin
Until the Heene family came along the Gosselin’s were a shoe-in to be the most dysfunctional family in television history (barely beating out the Hogan’s). With the dumbass antics of Jon and the conniving ways of Kate, the 8 Gosselin children are bound to be total messes by their 12th birthday right?
Alex Rodriguez
Starting with A-Rod’s poor douchebracket performance in the Spring, 2009 was a pretty up and down year for A-Rod. He revealed he was a cheater and a liar, then we found out he used steroids too, he was humiliated in the Details Magazine photo shoot and then he settled in to be the best role player in MLB history and won his first World Series ring. Then he broke up with Kate Hudson. The jury is still out on whether the Hudson break up is a positive or negative for Rodriguez.
NHL
The fourth rate sports league continued to show why it will never gain popularity as the on-ice officiating continued to be horrendous, the off-ice judgments in handing out fines and suspensions were all over the map and varied without rhyme or reason and the league maintained its position in being unfriendly and uncooperative with anyone associated with “New Media.”
David Kahn
The Minnesota Timberwolves GM has yet to make a good decision since being hired in June and still spouts arrogance to anyone that will listen to him speak about a sport that he clearly has no clue about. His basketball knowledge and decisions based on his lack of knowledge have been met with a shrug in the Minnesota media, but outside the state he and the Timberwolves are even more of a laughing stock then when the team was run by Kevin McHale.
Heidi and Spencer Pratt
The two biggest crap stains on American society love to bask in the hate that people thrust upon them simply because even bad attention is attention of some sort. The pair are quite possibly the worst human beings on the planet and the possibility of them reproducing makes me fear that the apocalypse is near.
Chicago Bears Organization
No team in the NFL has squandered more talent, made more front office mistakes, misused its players so poorly, treated its faithful followers so badly and produced more bad seeds than the Chicago Bears. Their 2009 season is a micro chasm of how poorly the organization is run. Between mortgaging the team’s future on a overhyped QB, running an offense that completely under utilizes the team’s best player or allowing what was once the team’s greatest strength (defense) to become old and decrepit, the Chicago Bears have shot themselves in the foot and don’t appear to have much to look forward to.
Check back next week as the semi-finalists are named.
Possibly Related Posts:
- The Call Outs: MLB Umpires and Beyond
- The Call-Outs
- The Call-Outs 5-12-10
- The Call Outs
- The Call-Outs 2-12
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What bad decision has Kahn made?? You can claim something’s a bad decision but its still too early for any decision of his to be fully regarded as a failure.
Sure you might not like the decision to draft Rubio because he’s not playing here but there was too much future value in him. Its way too early to say that was a failure until we see how it plays out and that could be years down the road. Maybe he eventually plays for the wolves and becomes a star or maybe he becomes a valuable trade asset that brings back a star. Maybe it blows up in their faces. Bottom line is its way too early to label it a failure.
You also might PERSONALLY not like his coaching hire but just because you dont like it doesnt make it a bad decision or a failure. Rambis played under and was an assistant coach to what many consider two of perhaps the three greatest coaches of all time. He was a highly coveted young coaching candidate and someone the old management never could have obtained.
And ANOTHER thing…
When it comes time to judging Kahn we should know what to judge him on. In the NBA a GM from a cold weather, mid to small market team should not be judged solely on championships but on just about everything else. The top free agent cities in the NBA are the big market cities (LA, New York, Chicago), warm weather cities (such as Orlando, Miami, Phoenix), cities in states with no state income tax (teams in Texas and Florida), and to a lesser extent teams with the lore and mystique of a storied history (Lakers, Celtics).
Now look at which teams have won championships since 1980. You have titles from the Los Angeles, Boston, Philidelphia, Detroit, Chicago, Houston, San Antonio and Miami. The only teams to not meet the above criteria were the ’83 76ers (but still a pretty huge market) and the ’89, ’90 and ’04 Pistons teams.
Bottom line is the day you step in as a GM for a cold weather, mid to small market team you already are facing a huge uphill battle some other GMs dont have to face. We need to wait a few years before we can truly judge anything Kahn has done.
Keep drinking that Kool-Aid buddy. The guy knows NOTHING about basketball, which has been evidenced by the team he assembled.
exactly, look at the record. and the fact that he trated the NBA Draft as a fantasy draft, and didn’t seem to understand that you’re allowed to draft positions other than point guard
Oh right, if you still have hope for the Wolves you’re a kool-aid drinker now? Kahn wasn’t my first choice but to say he has yet to make a good move, I disagree. I wanted Tyreke Evans but once he was off the board, I think Flynn was a good pick. Rubio had the most value at 5, Wolves fans would have been pissed had we passed him up.
This year isn’t what matters for the longterm success of the Wolves. Cap room and more picks, could be a nice summer 2010.
Jay Cutler!!!! No wait Bears organization that HAS to win this year
Maybe Kahn will end up being successful. It’s hard to tell. But as a non-T’wolves fan he hasn’t done anything to impress me yet. When your team is as bad as Minnesota you don’t draft someone who already said he’s not playing for your team. I have yet to see any example of that working out for anyone. It didn’t work for the Bucks a few years back either. Just how is that player doing anyway?
The mid-market team in the North argument is a fallacy. This is something Minnesota’s cheap owners have been selling for years and it’s BS. First of all, Minneapolis-St. Paul is the 13th largest TV market in the NBA. Many of the teams that you say we shouldn’t compare with the T-Wolves are larger markets as well. There are only four teams that don’t meat one of your criteria for being a great free agent city that are in a larger market than Minnesota.
Somehow cities teams like Utah, Cleveland, Portland, New Orleans, and Atlanta have managed to put together competitive teams despite being in a disadvantaged position. Yes, Cleveland lucked out with getting Lebron but take a way a four or five year stretch and they have been a very competitive team over the last 20 years. The Timberwolves haven’t had a sniff since Spreewell needed to feed his kids.
Other than a few exceptions, free agency isn’t going to win you any championships. Great teams are built by the draft with accessory pieces added as needed. And it’s been a long time since Minnesota has had a good draft. Kahn didn’t trade away all of Minnesota’s picks or cheat to sign an overrated swing man. That was done by the previous administration. But Kahn did have two picks in the Top 6 this year and flushed one down the toilet. The 6th pick was a clear indication that he knew the 5th pick was probably not going to work out. If you are a competive team, perhaps that’s a move you can make. If you are the Timberwolves and you have the 5th and 6th picks you need two players that can play.
Look, I can deconstruct every move Kahn has made and I will next week when he makes it to the semifinals. Let’s be honest about one fact: it takes a lot more faith/hope to put a rosy picture on the Wolves situation than it does to look at it with disgust/disbelief/distaste.
Who are the T-Wolves gonna sign with said cap space????
I hope Minnesota gets the first pick just to see how Kahn would screw up by not drafting Wall because he already has two young point guards…
They will take Wall if they get the first pick. Who are they going to sign? How many teams have cap space? How many guys are free agents? Can you trade to absorb cap space? Yes, you certainly can.
And Pete, go ahead and “deconstruct” every move he’s made, how long has he been on the job? We might as well go ahead and fire everyone after six months right?
Somehow cities teams like Utah, Cleveland, Portland, New Orleans, and Atlanta have managed to put together competitive teams despite being in a disadvantaged position. Yes, Cleveland lucked out with getting Lebron but take a way a four or five year stretch and they have been a very competitive team over the last 20 years. The Timberwolves haven’t had a sniff since Spreewell needed to feed his kids.
The Cavs missed the playoffs for 6 or 7 years from the late 90s til they got LeBron. Utah landed Williams in the draft, signed Boozer and Okur (free agency). Portland landed Roy/Aldridge in the draft.. they bottomed out and are solid now but need to get better to get over the hump. New Orleans lucked out with Chris Paul and signed Peja back in the day (free agency). Atlanta signed Joe Johnson.
Free agency and drafting goes hand-in-hand… Orlando – land #1 and draft Howard, sign Rashard Lewis.
Almost every team has used both except the Spurs.
Chris said: “But Kahn did have two picks in the Top 6 this year and flushed one down the toilet. The 6th pick was a clear indication that he knew the 5th pick was probably not going to work out. If you are a competive team, perhaps that’s a move you can make. If you are the Timberwolves and you have the 5th and 6th picks you need two players that can play.”
It’s easy to say that now, when the Wolves were on the clock – and I was at the Target Center, the whole fanbase WANTED Rubio. he had the best value at that pick.. his buyout was a concern that dropped him to 5. Flynn was the guy who could come in and immediately help – we needed a PG badly.
Actually, Portland didn’t land Roy in the draft… The Timberwolves did.
The draft and shrewd trades build winners not signing big money free agents… ask the Knicks, ask the Bucks when they started to spend $$ in free agency.
I understand that WE (the fans) wanted Rubio, but Kahn needs to then make a decision to put the eggs in the Rubio basket or avoid the temptation and bring in 2 top end talent players that can play immediately. He tried to have it both ways and got burnt. There are many ways the scenario could have played out (draft Rubio, take Curry to play SG at 6 and then draft Lawson at 18 to be the back-up being a possibility) but the path that Kahn chose was the worst. He sucks. He’s dumb. Weise, you are a smart guy, you deserve to be running an NBA team more than he does.
we’re also forgetting to consider the fact that Rubio will likely never even play for the T-Wolves…
No, we aren’t forgetting, it’s realistic and it’s not the worst thing in the world. Best asset, I’m glad we took him. I wanted Evans first and foremost but he wasn’t there…
I guess I’m missing what the Bucks and Knicks did with free agency besides give their own guys monster contracts and sign bad midlevel deals (something McHale was doing post WCF 2004).
Time will tell, I have faith that not even Kahn can screw up the possibilities coming summer 2010.
With a defense of David Kahn and Royce White, Andy you MN b-ball opinions are not very popular here today. Since almost everyone else here thinks both of those guys are incompetent douches, I appreciate you playing Devil’s advocate. Taking the contrarian pt. of view in both cases..gets the discussion going!
So you think the signing of Marbury and Anthony Mason were good free agency moves by the Knicks and Bucks?
Marbury never signed with the Knicks.. traded.
Mason signed a 3 year deal for Bucks for what.. 16-17 mil? 3 year deal doesn’t kill you.. 5 and 6 year ones that McHale loved to hand out kill ya.