This is f*uckin’ hysterical. I wonder if anyone would by a f*ckin baseball with a recorded Seymour Pennants rant for $90 f*ckin’ bucks?
https://www.leeunplugged.com/
Yep, Lee Elia, author of the original uncontrolled Cubs rant is selling a baseball with a toned down, yet positive Cubs rant recorded in a chip, and autographed for $90 bucks. I think he’s copywrited the word “f*ckin’â€.
The new rant is boring…I like the original better:
https://quote.webcircle.com/cgi-bin/features.cgi?idFeature=4
Or, listen with a Cubs 1983 slideshow at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uv23pqH9iG0
Why pay $90 bucks for a lame new Lee Elia rant? Why not spend $20 on a T shirt that says “Got Fukud?†or describes World Events since the Cubs last took it all. So please check out https://Since1908clothing.com and help out an old fart.
Go Cubs!
Seymour Pennants
Facebook:Â https://profile.to/seymourpennants/
Dinner with Marv Levy on NFL Draft Weekend
Last week, just after that young upstart Paul Banks talked to Marv on the phone, I met my old friend Marv Levy at the 4:30 Senior’s special at the Old Country Buffet in Schaumburg for dinner and Tequila shooters. I’ve known Marv from way back. My little sister Anita Pennants used to baby sit for him.Â
Little did Anita realize that little Marv would grow up to lead the Buffalo Bills to a record four consecutive Super Bowls. Marv still lives in the Chicago area, and we decided to catch the Senior’s special at Old Country Buffett. (note: not a real interview)
Seymour:Â Hey Marvelous, have you ever seen so many fat people in one place?
Marv: You know Pennants, you’re right! They are like moths to a deep fried flame. Give ‘em to me for a month, and I can get ‘em in shape so they can run the 40 in under a minute.
Seymour: Hell Marv, if you could get those lunkheads up in Buffalo to 4 straight Super Bowls, I’m sure you could get these lard asses into shape. ‘Course you might kill ‘em.
Marv:Â That would mean more fried chicken for you, Pennants.
Seymour: Remember Zambrano was giving some lame excuse about breaking caffeine addiction last week? I feel for the guy. I’m going though it myself, since the Doc told me to switch to Sanka.
Marv:Â So Pennants, what would you like to see Wrigley Field should be renamed as?
Seymour: Marvelous, ask me on your nickel….what do you want to see Wrigley renamed as?
Marv: I’d like to see the naming rights sold to a large grocery store chain…Piggly Wiggly. Call it Piggly Wiggly at Wrigley. That way, you get around all the damn Preservationists.
Seymour: Marv, did you ever take Steroids while coaching? Did you shoot up in that wrinkled old ass of yours?
Marv: Of course not, I’m all natural. No HGH in my blood. (grabs Seymour by both collars, lifting him up, and knocks over Seymour’s walker).  Go ahead, test me, I freakin’ dare you.
Seymour: So Marv, one last question. Would you rather see a black inexperienced President, a Woman President who’s a proven liar and who holds Bill’s balls in a jar of formaldehyde, or a coot almost as old as you?
Marv: Hell, I’m voting for Nader. Screw ‘em all.
Seymour: Marv I know you had the hots for my little sister. Did you and her ever? you know…?
Marv: Just last week….the Cubs got me so excited that……
Seymour: Ladies and Gentlemen, help me thank my friend Marv Levy (cheers)….
(note: not an actual conversation with Marv Levy, but hopefully you’ve figured that out by now)Â
Hey Sportsbank.net fans – None of the losers running for President is gonna save Social Security. So please check out https://Since1908clothing.com and help out an old fart, before mine runs out.
Go Cubs!
Seymour Pennants
Facebook:Â https://profile.to/seymourpennants/