How to suck at Twitter, see Alex Morgan, Danica Patrick accounts



Alex Morgan and Danica Patrick content has been really good to me. My material on both of these young star female athletes has delivered the goods in the page views and the SEO department. Therefore, I don’t want to be too harsh on Danica or Alex Morgan. And I’m not going to. I’m criticizing the PR person/publicist/press agent etc. who does their tweeting for them. I’m not criticizing Patrick or Morgan themselves.

Danica Patrick just hit 1 million on followers on Twitter the yesterday, the first NASCAR driver to ever hit that mark. It made me wonder why so many people follow her, despite the fact that her account has zero news value about 90% of the time.


If you want to view pictures of Danica’s mom’s banana bread or read air-kissed platitudes on holidays, then by all means follow her. If you want to get in on the ground floor with breaking Danica news, then you go elsewhere. Anywhere. Likewise with Alex Morgan. Maybe about once or two a year you’ll see something worthwhile in their Twitter feed. And again, I’m not ripping Alex Morgan or Danica personally. Look at my Twitter account background picture- it’s me interviewing Danica a couple years ago, a screen grab from NBC Chicago.

When I had an exclusive with Alex Morgan, I found her to be extremely friendly and professional. And I’m sure sometimes both Patrick and Alex Morgan do actually their tweets their own thoughts and feelings once in a great while, or dictate to one of their handlers to do it. The best is vanilla PRspeak, authored by a corporatized spokesperson.




As you can see, the Alex Morgan Twitter account is not authored by an human being, but by the detailed findings of a focus group. No human being can be “up with people” all the time and overly positive about everything every second. That’s not what life is, it’s not what being a person is. I get that most tweets are going to be self-promotion or some form product placement/self-branding. After all, social media is the most narcissistic invention in the history of mankind. And I get why nowadays everyone is afraid to say anything interesting, or personal about themselves but you can’t be THIS BORING! You just can’t be this pointless and bad at Tweeting. Unless you’re the social media manager running Danica’s account.



As you can see, it’s nothing but product shilling, paid for tweets and the seven beyond boring cliche tweets that everyone makes (full list detailed here) You’ll see both did plenty of “Go USA!” tweets lately during the Sochi Olympics because that’s always the safest thing you can tweet. Patriotism always sells. So Danica Patrick and Alex Morgan have a combined 2.32 million followers, and this is what they have to say.


And I’m not knocking them for having a Media Relations pro do their tweeting for them. Just about every celebrity does. It’s just annoying and frustrating because writing about both Alex Morgan and Danica Patrick is good for business. Looking at their Twitter feeds, though, is good for nothing. And good for no one.

Paul M. Banks owns The Sports, an affiliate of Fox Sports. An MBA and Fulbright scholar, he’s also a frequent analyst on news talk radio; with regular segments on ESPN,NBCCBS and Fox. A former NBC Chicago and Washington Times writer, he’s also been featured on the History Channel. President Obama follows him on Twitter (@paulmbanks)

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  1. Hugh Beaumont says:

    Sorry that I wasted my time to read this. I think you need to add “Social Media Guru” to your profile. That would pretty much sum up this professional analysis. #Clueless

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