Cubs place husband of hottie Kim DeJesus on DL


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The Chicago Cubs today activated right-handed pitcher Shawn Camp from the 15-day disabled list and placed outfielder David DeJesus on the 15-day disabled list with a right shoulder sprain.

DeJesus isn’t really much worth talking about, but his wife Kimberly DeJesus or Kim DeJesus certainly is. At this point, and most of you will disagree with me, David DeJesus is husband of Kim DeJesus. Much more than Kim DeJesus being the husband of Cubs OF David DeJesus.

Right now Cubs apathy is so sky high in this city, that the gap in interest between scorching hot women and pedestrian Cubs outfielders is wider than its ever been. Look at the gallery of Kim DeJesus for more.

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Cubs OF David DeJesus: Hot Baseball Wife (Kim DeJesus Pics)


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Cubs outfielder David DeJesus isn’t that good at baseball. However, he’s good at life. Especially when you see who he’s sleeping with on a regular basis. A new televison show that I avoided like the plague called “Baseball Wives” exists/will exist/still exists/don’t care. And even though that piece of VH1 crapola is guaranteed to dumb you down, I feel a Saturday in baseball season deserves a post in that vein. Because no one is online on Saturdays, and no one cares about baseball in Chicago.

The Chicago Cubs signed former Oakland Athletics OF David DeJesus , which means Kimberly DeJesus, Kim DeJesus, previously known as Kim Iliff is now in Chicago. And if she was on that stupid reality show she’d blow all the other baseball wives out of the water.

Observe.

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Illini Day at Cubs set for Sunday July 7th


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Former WWE Diva and Greek Goddess Maria Kanellis is both a Cubs and Illini fan. Maybe the Illinois fan will be at Illini at the Cubs? Probably not. I’m sure she has better things to do.

The Chicago I FUND is set to hosting Illini Day at Wrigley Field on Sunday, July 7, when the Cubs host the Pittsburgh Pirates at 1:20 p.m. Whoah Cubs vs Pirates!! Get your tickets now for an extremely relevant game with huge postseason implications now.

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Chicago Cubs 300 lb prospect Daniel Vogelbach slims down, remakes himself


In June of 2011, an 18 year kid named Daniel Vogelbach was selected by the Chicago Cubs in the second round of the MLB amateur draft. The high school first baseman was listed as 5’11″ 285. However, in the pics we saw of him, he looked easily three bills. But we thought hey Daniel Vogelbach he can hit a ton.

The Cubs claimed right after the draft he dropped 40 pounds off what he was listed on the scouting report I quoted above. Vogelbach throws right and bats left. The now allegedly “245 lb” prospect fits into the “Cubs 105 year rebuilding plan,” but how? That Anthony Rizzo guy kind of has 1b locked down for awhile. In the video after the jump you’ll see that he has slimmed down to 240ish.

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Chicago Cubs draft kid from Princeton! Sideshow Bob upset


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The Chicago Cubs took some kid from Princeton University in the 30th round of the MLB Draft yesterday. I didn’t even know Princeton had a baseball team. And I guess they’re relevant? We all know that Princeton alums rule the universe. Much to chagrin of Sideshow Bob from The Simpsons. (see video below) They win at life; not on the baseball diamond. Princeton is also the setting for the greatest novel in history: This Side of Paradise by F. Scott Fitzgerald.

Yesterday was another big day for Princeton as the Cubs draft sheet showed this:

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Cubs draft kid from Michigan State! Let’s burn couches!


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Go green! Go white! Yesterday was another big day for Michigan State sports as the Chicago Cubs draft sheet showed this:

7 (198) David Garner RHP Michigan State University (MI) 9/21/92 R R 5-11 180

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Cubs MLB Draft Day 2, and Northwestern’s Pat Fitzgerald on the mic


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Today was a big day for the Chicago Cubs. Sure, they lost to the Pittsburgh Pirates 2-0. However, Northwestern coach Pat Fitzgerald sang the 7th inning stretch, and the Cubs loaded up for the future during day two of the MLB Draft. Getting drafted by an MLB ballclub is a really big deal for these kids. Even if it is the Cubs!

“Still counts” as Lonely Island and Akon would say.

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Cubs MLB Draft: first night synopsis


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With the Chicago Cubs present being…well it’s present. And the Cubs past being, well the Cubs past, why not focus on the Cubs future? Wow, not one, but two Cubs draft articles? Yes, indeed we are doing just that. Wouldn’t you rather talk about the Cubs future than the Cubs present?

The Cubs tonight made two picks in the opening rounds of the 2013 MLB Draft: third baseman Kris Bryant out of the University of San Diego with the second overall pick went first. In the second round, the Cubs selected left-handed pitcher Robert Zastryzny from the University of Missouri.

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Yankees draft 3B from Notre Dame; Duke, Cowboys & Heat fans rejoice


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With the #26 pick in the MLB Draft, the New York Yankees selected Notre Dame 3B Eric Jagielo. I admit I know nothing about Eric Jagielo, and he could very well be the greatest kid in the world, the best student, the nicest guy (we already know he’s a very accomplished baseball player and about to become very rich).

However, as he goes from ND to the Yankees, wouldn’t it be hilarious if he were also a Duke Blue Devils or LA Lakers fan?

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Evaluating, Analyzing Chicago Cubs #2 overall draft pick Kris Bryant


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The Chicago Cubs picked third baseman Kris Bryant from University of San Diego with the second overall pick in the 2013 MLB Draft just now. Kris Bryant was recommended by area scout Alex Lontayo.

“Kris Bryant had an incredible season at San Diego, hitting for both power and average,” said Jason McLeod, Cubs VP of Scouting & Player Development. “He is a big, strong, athletic player, and we feel he has the attributes of someone who could fit into the middle of a lineup at the major league level.”

Kris Bryant hit .329 with 80 runs scored, 13 doubles, three triples, 31 home runs and 62 RBI. His 31 home runs led the nation. Kris Bryant also led the nation in runs scored, walks (66) and slugging percentage (.820).

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Time to dismiss Cubs vs White Sox Series; Soriano and Dunn too


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Let the Cubs fans go back to hating the Cardinals. Let the White Sox fans go back to hating the Twins. Let’s end this manufactured charade that the media spins into a so-called “rivalry.”

In 2008, I attended a Chicago Cubs home game on a first date with a young woman who revealed during early in the game that she was “good friends” with Alfonso Soriano. I thought maybe she was just playing the “oh, look at what famous athletes are interested in me, doesn’t that really impress you?” card. For some odd reason, extremely insecure and very vapid women love to run this trick play against me; as if it would actually work?

Sadly, this group of women actually includes some female “journalists” I know.

Back to Soriano girl, she claimed to have his bank pin number and showed me some Facebook photos I could have lived without seeing. Coincidentally, this game happened to be the exact same one in which Sori got hit by a pitch, injured and placed on IR for 6 weeks. My “date” was right there at his every beck and call that evening.

So maybe she was “close friends” with him; maybe she was something more.

She was kind of a disgusting human being with very little going on upstairs anyway, so who really cares?? She seemed to hate her job and her life, so I don’t really miss her white, pudgy St. Louis Cardinals fan butt. The only reason I even bring this up 5 years later is…it’s by far the worst experience at the ballpark I ever had.

Until last night.

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Cubs acquire reliever; may only lose 100 games this year! NOT 105!


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The Chicago Cubs yesterday acquired some bullpen help in right-handed pitcher Alex Burnett. This extra arm in the pen should help the Cubs pitching staff tremendously. They may only lose 100 games this MLB season; not 105. Burnett was claimed off waivers from the Baltimore Orioles.

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